Friday, September 11, 2009

Good fences make good friends

Sometimes I feel that I take both of you very much for granted. I think that both of you are yet single, have no major family worries to disturb you, and are well to do. With feelings like this, I want you to be in my service anytime whenever I need; and when I found you not available for me, it hurts me the most. Is it really the best approach for a friendship? Certainly not! It is not even a good one. Friendship is not only expecting and taking. Friendship flows, at least should flow, bidirectionally. Though being one of the closest relations, it must have some limits for expectations from each other so that it should forever go on happily. Sometimes I really have this kind of thoughts and they really disturb me. Yesterday, when I tried to call you and you were not available for me, I had a sudden flair of such thoughts that made me depressed for the most part of the evening until you called me back. It was not your fault. You were trying again and again to contact me, and from my side, I was also dialing up for you. It might have caused my cellphone to be engaged. It was a cent percent technical problem, but I was in no mood of understanding the situation. I just wanted some suggestion from you. I just wanted you to be with me. And I felt that you are not available for me.

Perhaps, you know the poem of Robert Frost: Mending Walls. Often I feel that it metaphorically refers to friendship: One friend who does not believe the necessity and existence of walls between them and the other who understands the importance of them. Robert Frost takes the part of first friend, who argues that do they really need walls between their fields when there are no cows to cross the borders, but his neighbor just quotes an old adage: “Good fences make good neighbours.” Robert Frost, as I do, did not believe in this philosophy at first, but by reaching to last line of the poem, he ends it with his friend’s words, as if he is fully agreeable to him: Good fences make good neighbours.

I too did not believe in the necessity of a fence. But it does exist. You must accept it in a friendly manner. After all, it is for our well-being and not for anything else. Last night taught me this fact so that I can go on happily with no childish thoughts for such silly things. I will try my best to respect each other. You too feel free to let me know if you ever find me crossing my fence. Let us respect the fences to be good friends forever.

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